The One Where I Took Sleep Hygiene Seriously (And It Helped)
- Aug 13, 2025
- 6 min read
Updated: 6 days ago
This is part of my Sleep Mini-Series. Read the introduction here.
Sleep Hygiene with Chronic Illness: When Sleep Feels Impossible
For years after becoming ill, I struggled with restless nights and groggy mornings. I either slept for 12 hours straight, or struggled to sleep at all. Either way I was still exhausted and unrefreshed. I tried all the common sleep tips: cutting out caffeine in the afternoon, not sleeping in the day, getting to bed earlier, limiting screen time, and yet, nothing seemed to be working for me. But, my approach wasn't quite right. I would try one thing, and because it didn’t help that night, I considered that it was having no effect on my sleep, then I’d try the next thing. Each time expecting it to instantly have a positive impact on my sleep.
I wasn’t failing at sleep. I was expecting instant results from changes that needed time.
That's why I eventually decided to take a closer look at sleep hygiene with chronic illness, rather than expecting overnight results. After all, there’s a reason all the sleep experts say these things work. But, instead of following the advice like a checklist, I gradually added or tweaked things in my home and routine, depending on what was achievable and worked best for me.
I understood the logic of helping my body understand it was time for rest. And as I began to understand the science behind sleep, it reminded me of something I'd done years earlier. When my son was little, I gradually taught him a calming bedtime routine so he could settle himself to sleep. It struck me that, as adults, perhaps we need the same gentle reminders that it's safe to rest.
Creating a Bedroom That Invites Rest
Beginning with the environment I was sleeping in was an obvious starting point for me. After moving into a new home, I'd finally reached the point where I could decorate my bedroom and buy new furniture. I tried to create a calm and relaxing space.
I chose a relaxing lavender colour for the walls, and used a lavender pillow mist on my bed. Also, I noticed that I feel more relaxed if my environment is clean and tidy. It dials my anxiety down a notch. And my breathing is easier if there is less dust. Too much clutter can make our minds feel busy because our brain sees it as unfinished business. That's something I can really relate to. So I now do my best to keep my bedroom clean and tidy.
Gradually, my bedroom became a safe and relaxing place, one that I wanted to be in. I no longer related my bedroom to frustration and nights lying awake. It was somewhere to rest and feel relaxed.
My bedroom became a safe and relaxing place, one that I wanted to be in.
Guidelines, Not Rules
We’re often advised to keep our bedrooms cool, but I found it interesting to learn why. Your body’s core temperature naturally drops in the evening, signalling to it to get ready for sleep. 16–18°C (60–65°F) is what’s often recommended. However, I ideally like my bedroom cooler than that and my Mum, who I now live with, prefers hers hotter.
Similarly with light, although the experts suggest a dark room achieved by blackout blinds or curtains, I know people that cannot sleep in a room that is totally dark. They either leave the curtains open a crack, or have a soft nightlight on.
I do prefer a dark room, and use an eyemask on occasions, especially when I’m away and cannot control my environment. I find ones with Bluetooth headphones in, like these, particularly useful. Then I can also listen to something soothing to help me sleep. This can also help with blocking out any unwanted noise that you have no control over. Yes, I’m referring to the snoring sleep partners!
It's a reminder that we're all individuals and there’s no one-size-fits-all. We have to do what works best for us.
Calming the Mental Chaos
Once my bedroom was a more relaxing environment, I felt I needed to do the same with my mind. A stressed, stimulated brain doesn’t rest easy. It’s tempting to work, watch TV, or scroll social media on our phones in bed. And it’s all too easy to get into that difficult conversation with your spouse while you’re both getting ready for bed at the end of a long day. But these activities stimulate your brain and can create an anxious association with your bedroom. I know from experience that taking work or arguments to bed is not conducive to a restful night's sleep, trust me, I’ve tried!
I find drifting off to sleep is so much easier if I keep my bedroom solely as a place of calm and relaxation, no work, scrolling or mental stimulation. Even removing my laptop from the room makes a difference. Although turned off, its presence still seemed to keep my brain alert.
If I have any big emotions or worries in my head before bed, I journal about them. To “offload” my mind, a bit like a pensieve from Harry Potter! I also keep a notepad and pen by my bed for jotting down random thoughts or items for shopping lists or to-do lists for the same reason. Once on paper the thoughts can leave my head.
Often, I will also do a sleep meditation or breath work session once in bed. They can really relax the mind ready for sleep in just a few minutes. Many a time I’ve drifted off to a sleep meditation playing through my Bluetooth eye mask.
If you can’t sleep, experts suggest getting out of bed and doing something boring in dim light until you feel sleepy again. But for those of us with chronic illness or pain, getting back out of bed may not be feasible. I’ve found reading a book or listening to audiobooks, sleep meditations, or calming music can help.
Word of caution: Using a phone for calming sounds and audiobooks risks distraction. I’ve accidentally ended up scrolling instead of relaxing more times than I’d like to admit!
Relearning the Art of a Wind-Down Routine
As adults, we often forget how to wind down. Children have calming bedtime routines to help them settle quickly. Why shouldn’t we? We knew how to wind down once, we can relearn it.
I found that without a wind-down routine, I had no idea what time I would be going to bed each night. There was always the temptation to watch one more episode, or one more social media reel. I soon came to love having a routine paving my way towards bed. And it also ensures that I follow my teeth and skincare regime, instead of skipping them because I’ve stayed up too late and I’m too tired to be bothered.
We knew how to wind down once, we can relearn it.
Your wind-down doesn’t need to be complicated or scented with lavender, and certainly doesn’t need to look like mine. My bedtime routine generally looks like: a calming nighttime tea, gentle yoga stretches, followed by flossing and brushing teeth, washing and moisturising my face, then reading a book with a dim light in bed.
Some people like to take a gentle walk, have a bath or shower. What matters most is that it’s what works for you, is relaxing and signals to your nervous system that sleep is next. Our brains loves consistency so it can predict what’s expected of it next. So consistently giving it the message that it is time and safe to relax into sleep can make all the difference in encouraging sleep.
These changes didn’t transform my sleep overnight, though. They were small pieces of a much bigger picture.
Improving Sleep Takes Time and Patience
One night of “doing everything right” won’t fix your sleep instantly. It didn’t for me. It takes patience and consistency, once you’ve found what works for you.
From both learning and experience, our 21st Century lives promote exactly the opposite to restful sleep! We’re in well-heated, well-lit rooms, with various screens bombarding our eyes with blue light, and we’re stimulating our brains more than ever. These encourage our brain and body to be awake and alert. Now I understand this, it’s no wonder I was struggling so much!
Habit change is hard, so take it one step, one night at a time. Change one thing this week and see how it feels. Once it becomes a habit, try another. This approach worked well for me.
Next in the Sleep Mini-Series: The One Where a Consistent Sleep Schedule Became My Superpower, where I share why a consistent sleep schedule became one of the biggest game changers for my sleep.
What sleep hygiene tips have you tried that work for you?
What is one small tweak you will make this week?
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